Sunday, December 29, 2013

2014…! You have no idea. I'm ruthless.

Here's the thing, I'm completely cool with who I am and what I do.  And yes, I do realize this is a terribly vague statement that applies to every aspect of my life.  However, it doesn't come easily, the whole being "cool" with it, especially when it comes to your craft blog.  But, it does and/or can happen over time if you generally put in a great effort to just being a GREAT you, a true you.  Am I the " GREATEST?", no…but, I strive.  And ultimately, I believe that is this action, that is the fundamental difference between living at YOUR fullest and just "living."  


That's why I can feel comfortable with cussing.  Hell, shit, fuck… all good.  Why?  Because it's just flavor.  Like adding seasoning to plain old chicken breast.  You're offended, that's okay, I respect you not following me.  Everyone has choices and I make mine.  I choose to swear.  I like it and no matter who poo-poo's it… it always feels good to me and mine, so I embrace that.  And, ultimately, YOU have to be okay with you, regardless.  I like me, cuss and all.


36 is an amazing year.  I actually said that about most of my middle 30's, however… they do SERIOUSLY get richer.  Who fucking knew?!  I couldn't even begin to grasp this quote (see below) before my 33rd birthday.  Now, Take me or leave me… either way, I'm good.


So, I'll shoot you straight.  I'm no saint, I'm in fact a sinner in many o' biblical ways, but I BELIEVE… Your soul can be magic, can be good, even Great really… and even to others, while you sin.  Some may be unable to ever express this outward to another, other's never more than a subtle, silent gesture.  But, some of us, can make a larger ripple.  And it's that thought, that ripple, that keeps this blog alive within me.  That hope of.  That filthy Ripple.


When I created this blog so many years ago, I thought it was going to be this big, grand, great recipe.  A recipe to and/or for sewing, to fabric & the designers of thus,  to the people within it, this creative online world.  I actually wanted that.  Now, I've played that game (I've been privileged with newspaper articles, magazine write-ups, radio programs, book contributions, and even my own book.) and I'm not interested in the game anymore.  It comes with such a "high" demand.  Demands for everything and every ones who wants them.  That, why I'm done.  I'm cool with just being me.  Sewing when my family life allows for it (not to my insecurities), showing my creations (without feeling an anxiety inducing "need" to give additional directions in how to create it), and to "write" on my blog without the need to "care take" to my audience.  What once was, is no more.  For here, anyways... at my HOUSE.

Ultimately it, this blog, has grown into a "being" of it's own that I do hope, has been perceived as a "rest stop" within conformity IN THE END.  A stop that might have brought you PERSONALLY; a simple surprise along our way, maybe even made you stop and ponder something, a sense of a bonding-strangeness maybe?, anything other than the typical, tutorial craft blog.  "Why," you ask?  Not because there is anything at ALL wrong with those educational blogs, but rather that they are ultimately…  just, not me.  This is my true hope for my House.  My House of A La Mode.  A space within. THAT'S WHAT MAKES ME HAPPY.   A space within, that is for pure enjoyment.  No real knowledge, no real direction, no real "space" in your life that would create ANY frustration. Yep, no frustration over any of the following;  doubt, creativity, ability, inadequacies, finical restrictions, or any other negative connotations that could arise from perusing such craft blogs.


Why should this work?  Why should I not have to beat the pavement of the other craft/sewing-world-blogs???  Kiss every ones ass, re-create the wheel, jump through every time-sucking hoop for others and the possibility of the "new" followers??…..  Because.  BECAUSE!  If, it this doesn't succeed, this blog.  I don't give a shit.  I'm NOT loosing anything over the time I put in here, because I'm just being ME and ME is all I need to succeed in MY life.  In the end of the day, this is not MY JOB, but my hobby!  That's why, I CHOOSE NOT to join the rat race.  I CHOOSE ME.

I'm kinda great to everyone that matters to me.  And that'll always be enough to them.  I'm enough.

You may feel the need to express your emotions over this post, and I might need to empress my decision to delete them.  You may get this and you may not.  However, I'm writing this ultimately, TO 2014, YOU ARE MY AUDIENCE.  Between me and you.  I am going to exploit you every time I get.  I am going to take advantage of you at every moment I see and when you think you shouldn't be looking towards my way… I will be plotting against you.  Against, any and all, who might think me week in achieving my ultimate goal, happiness.   I so fucking got this.  Period.

So, if you just read this entire post… pull up your big-girl panties sisters & brothers and get serious about spending your newly "given", NOT granted,  year … and kick ass, take names.  YOU deserve it!!!
 As my 16 old would say, "YOLO."

X, Heather

23 comments:

  1. Fuck yes. I decided a long time ago that what I do, I do for me. If people don't like it, it's their problem, not mine. I treat everyone with respect and kindness, I swear like a fucking sailor (I swear not because I have a small brain, but rather, a large vocabulary), and I love with my whole heart. I like your style, Heather. I like your style.

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  2. You know I fucking love you, cuss words and all.

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  3. Isn't it wonderful when that epiphany almost literally smacks you in the back of your head, and you finally realise that what really matters is the happiness of those you really truly love and who really truly love you, and that if someone doesn't accept you for who you truly are then it's their loss, not yours! Oh and if you think that 36 is good, just wait for 38, I'm beginning to think that all those "older" people who say that life begins at 40/50 might be on to something!!

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  4. Isn't it wonderful when that epiphany almost literally smacks you in the back of your head, and you finally realise that what really matters is the happiness of those you really truly love and who really truly love you, and that if someone doesn't accept you for who you truly are then it's their loss, not yours! Oh and if you think that 36 is good, just wait for 38, I'm beginning to think that all those "older" people who say that life begins at 40/50 might be on to something!!

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  5. I just celebrated my 38th last week and all my nieces (in their 20's and starting with 'real' life now), were like "Oh, you turning 21 again (wink, wink)' and I was all, "Oh, hell NO! You could not pay me enough to go back to my 20's!". They all looked at me like I had lost my mind. I mean, I must be crazy, right? I live the life of 'mundane' stay at home mom duties. I told them that somewhere around 35-36 they would have this moment when they realized they were good with who they were and how life was going and they too would never want to go back. I have also described myself as a Christian with a potty mouth, I was born a sinner and I will die a sinner, but I will spend everyday in between trying to be better. I can not wait to see what you have in store!

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  6. Loving this Heather! I like genuine people - they keep me coming back.

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  7. love this and love you, in my early 30's I decided to be me and everyone else could get on board or jump ship. Has always served me well. Glad to call you a friend, Cheers to a great 2014!

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  8. Love this post and love your approach to life. I decided in my mid-thirties to be me, if people couldn't get on board, then hoped they jumped ship. It has always served me well. Cheers to a wonderful 2014! Glad to call you a friend and I can't wait to see what you are up to in the coming year.

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  9. Just yes! Well rather fuck yes I do it just for me and I am damn good. And so are you although you don't need anyone of us to tell you that!

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  11. Love this post!!! It totally kicks ass - you hit the nail on the head.

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  12. I have missed your blogging because of your authentic voice. post whatever the fuck you like and it will be read or not. How freeing to be at peace with that!!

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  13. The older I get the less I care about what other people think. Heather, we may live on opposite sides of the country, we may listen to different music and have different outside-of-sewing interests, but I just know that for all of our differences, you and I--we get it. Say what you want, do what you want, be true to yourself. I'd rather have 5 real friends and by real I mean real in who they are than have 500 followers who are in it to see what they can get from me. Preach, sister. I'll be here listening and amening.

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  14. This is the best, most honest post I have read in a long time and I love it! Thanks for sharing.

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  15. I'm just glad to see YOU on the blog these days! I've missed the "Heather" part of the blog for a while and if you want to say whatever you want to say...well, pretty sure it's your blog to do so! Sometimes potty words are the only way to express things. Granted, one of my new year's resolutions was to use less of them but that's partly because they just don't look good on me...and my 5 year old REALLY likes to repeat everything I say so well, you get the picture. But if you want to type out a 50 word sentence in all poo poo words, go right on ahead! Can't wait to see what sewing creations you have in store for 2014! ~ Mary Carole

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  16. I found myself in my 30's and it was awesome! Now I'm in my early 40's...everything is starting to fall apart and I'm like WTF.

    I live by the mantra of be who you want to be and do what you want to do. And if people don't like it, they can leave the room and go have a cookie.

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  17. I just want to tell you that I am new to blogging and really loved your page. Most likely I'm going to bookmark your blog post. Your blog is really inspirational and motivational. Bless you :)

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  18. I fucking love you. Mid 30s really are a turning point, aren't they?

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  19. I fucking love you. And isn't the mid 30s just the beginning of awesome insofar as finding yourself?

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  20. I've been reading your blog for years now and I've always smiled when you cuss like a sailor. It gives that "She's a real down to earth person...." Sometimes when you get into this crafting sewing beautifully draped in fabric world you lose the realness of those behind the creativity. They turn into more "Martha's" and well, one is enough of her. Be proud of who you are! This is your space and for those of us that are here, we're here because we LOVE reading what you write...if someone comes that has their panties bunched up to their boobs and can't enjoy that...so be it...keep movin' on with yer corn cob up yer butt. ;)

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